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I miss my friend…

Posted by zgriptzu on March 6, 2010

I remember the first time we talked more than “A hot chocolate and a Salitos, please ;;)” and I remember I used to tell you that you always say things that make me think over more… I remember the looks we used to exchange in different situations… I remember how and what you teached me to be and how you were taking back things you have said to me, trying to show me just another angle of judging… I remember how proud I used to be of our relationship… of our friendship, that’s what I considered it to be… I’m looking backwards and noticing how you changed me… I soooo hated myself, but you made me discover myself and made me love myself and made me be proud of what I became. This me is about you. This everything is about you, because without you, this would have never been.

I remember I learnt, in time, your four types of look… one when you are ironical, your eyes smile somehow and their colour turns kind of a green… another one when you don’t like something or when you are nervous, you have the eyes veeery opened and full of life, you can’t focus on anything and your eyes are fully green… you eyeball… another look, when you focus on something and your eyes are of a fresh light blue and you don’t keep them completely opened, you are just in your own world, no one could disturb you easily… and the last of your looks is when you love what you see, when you really like it or you admire what you see, your eyes are of a shiny blue which gives the sensation of plunging into what you see, like you would go sooo deep into it that you could see through it.

When you want to say something, but you cannot find the right words or you are nervous, you strung your lips and touch your chin with your forefinger, under a conspiratorial smile.  You adore testing the limits of one’s capacity, you take every discussion to your extreme. When you like what you are told, you open your nostrils and you spin a lock of hair on your right forefinger. You love to seem careless towards the majority of people you get in touch with. Somewhere deep inside, you really really do not care, but there is a middle layer where you do care.

Arrogance and narcissism are your most powerful characteristics. You love yourself more than anything in the world, you do live only for yourself and everything you do is to make you feel good, you have no interest in making the others accept, like or love you. You do not let anyone and anything affect you in any possible way. If those how talk have no importance to you, they are not involved in any of the processes that take place in you mind, heart, or life, even if you seem to have a minimum of interest in what they say.

You adore joshing the girl you like, but veeeeeery subtle, sometimes you may seem like you don’t see her, when, in fact, you are making up an idea in your mind and you feel devine when she takes a sweet look at you because of any reason. You are horny almost all the time. You could see everything through this part of life. And I also know that green turns you on. You want to seem seem careless to HER, you’ve got that allure of a guy who can get everything he wishes for, but when some girl is so important (even just for a few moments) that overcomes this limit, you become very vulnerable and you feel every single touch, word, meaning, movement, change… just like you would be burned on a windy rainy beach.

I miss you, I miss hanging around with you, I miss you taking photos of every inch that surrounds you, I miss your smile when you were making fun of yourself, of me, of everything, I miss you telling me “Wait until you’re 18”, I miss myself when I used to be near you. I miss my friend in you.


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One Response to “I miss my friend…”

  1. eu said

    well at least you got me right 🙂

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